Iʻm not an “Aesthetic Girl” and thatʻs okay

Recently, Iʻve been feeling a pull to try and be an ✨Aesthetic Girl ✨. You know what Iʻm talking about…

Skincare is on point, makeup done, cool + casual outfit, productive day… That life looks amazing. Those women look amazing. 

And if thatʻs you, congratulations! You should feel good about it. Youʻre putting in the effort to your life and I hope that makes you happy. Truly. 

But… I am not an Aesthetic Girl. 

I am the complete opposite. As Iʻm typing this out, Iʻm wearing my boyfriendʻs University of Hawaii weightlifting shirt with some comfy elephant print pants my mom got me from thailand. It is NOT a vibe. Not even a little bit.

My apartment is cluttered all the time. 

I donʻt know how to do my makeup. Itʻs gotten better… but itʻs definitely not IT girl worthy. 

And my clothes are finally just starting to get a little bit better. In my last post, I talked about wanting to have a better appearance (You can read about that here). And thatʻs still true. I like putting a little more effort in. 

But I still feel so far away from an aesthetic girl. 

And thatʻs okay.

Although it looks really cool and visually pleasing to the eye, I donʻt want that for myself. 

I like my elephant pants. I like never brushing my hair. I like not drinking coffee. I like my (very) lived-in apartment. I like going outside looking like a ragamuffin because I was too lazy to put something presentable on. 

Thatʻs me. 

Iʻve come to realize that everyone needs different things to be happy. Like duh… Carly. But really. When was the last time you didnʻt think you were right? That your way of life was the correct one?

More recently, Iʻve been talking with a friend who is almost the complete polar opposite of me. It is so surprising, confusing and refreshing at the same time. 

A lot of times, I just donʻt get her at all.

Why would you want to do that? How could you think that?

I feel like I canʻt give proper advice (when she asks for it) because we are so inherently different. What would make me feel happy or at peace, would be a disaster for her. 

Itʻs just crazy because we have the same goal. We want to get to the same place. And yet, as always, there are multiple ways to get there. (Mid-article realization: cliches are easy to think about in theory, but actually putting them in action is when the enlightenment comes… anyway…)

It is not my way or the highway. 

I guess what Iʻm trying to say is, itʻs important to know yourself. 

Find your own way. Know who you are and who you arenʻt. You should find what lights you up and filter out what doesnʻt. 


With all the content out there in the world. Itʻs easy to get lost. To want to be like a certain person you admire. 

That life might not be for you. And thatʻs okay. 

Inspiration can sometimes lead to imitation, but know you're your own person. 

Donʻt lose you. You are the most important thing there is.