How to not hate yourself while posting on TikTok (or any other social media app)
I took a break from TikTok.
It had become mentally draining, an unhealthy outlet. I dreaded making them and would stress out if I hadnʻt made one that day. Iʻd look at the numbers constantly and I would take everything personal.
If I made a talking video showing more of my personality and it didnʻt do well – I would be depressed. I was jealous of the users who saw success copying other peopleʻs content and it felt miserable to keep going.
So I stopped for a while. I went cold turkey for almost two months.
It wasnʻt until I ran into one of my sponsors (Jason at Waiakea!) at a local event when I started to second guess my decision. The timing couldnʻt have been more perfect. I was just telling my friend that I might be done posting, blah blah blah. But then we run into him and he brings up my tiktoks.
He tells me that he loves them and it feels like iʻm always telling a story.
Me? Telling a story… hmm, never thought of it like that.
Literally hours later, I got a dm from a stranger on Instagram that said he came from Tiktok and wanted to reach out because he liked my TikToks…
Well…
How can I deprive people of my glorious content? (hint: sarcasm)
Do I continue?...
Was I really going to start again?
I had a perplexing thought earlier this year where I presumed that the content creators who say “even if I just help one person with my content, itʻs worth it” was bogus.
No one would be happy if their content only got one view. Even if that one piece of content meant the world to that person.
You wouldnʻt know that.
You see the number and youʻre disappointed. Why did it do so poorly? I made good stuff!!!
But the truth is, you just never know who you're affecting (duh, carly).
After more contemplation, I realized that TikTok wasnʻt necessarily the problem (who knows what Chinaʻs doing with that info haha).
How I was reacting to everything was.
I decided to try again, but I knew I needed a new approach. I couldnʻt keep doing what I was doing. It would tear me apart.
So how do I post on TikTok now? Here it is…
How to not hate yourself while posting on TikTok:
Open TikTok app
Scroll a little until I find a sound I like OR record original idea
Post
Leave app
My TikTok rules (followed to the best of my ability because itʻs sometimes impossible):
Do not look at views
Do not look at likes
Do not look at followers
Thatʻs pretty much it.
The caveat of this plan is that I miss a lot of comments, which is a bummer, but I do my best to respond to some. As for the rest of it, I have no idea how my content is doing.
And I feel frickinʻ great. Honestly. Itʻs game changing.
All that noise, dopamine hits from a viral video, negative spirals after a failed video — itʻs all gone.
Through this process, Iʻve learned how much weight I was putting on those numbers. I would equate my likes, comments and follower count to my self-worth. If no one comments or if people (that I donʻt even know) unfollow me, then that means nobody likes me. They want me to stop posting. Nobody cares.
All of these self-deprecating thoughts discouraged me from sharing what I wanted.
But in my last month of being 27 years old, Iʻm choosing me. What I enjoy.
If that means low views and less followers… I guess Iʻm okay with that.
Detaching myself from the result and just doing what I want has brought the fun back into creating. I hope it can for you too.
